-your smile saves me-

From the very beginning,

I never wish to be hooked up

in a situation that I don't have

any right to escape..

There is no such a thing

as to give up the friendship,

and the many good old things

we've been through.

I never dream of invading

any of your privacy

and influencing such choices

that leads to some internal chaos.

It is always been my pleasure

to help others to satisfy my own needs.

I had this feeling of not so good

in terms of having this string

that never in my own expectations

becomes so attached into it..

..am so afraid then, of loosing

the essence of my own presence to them

yet I have to make a choice in order

to protect myself

from the veracity of the real story.

It would be better for me

to embrace you from a distance

than to be near without any assurance

of embracing me back.

Hence, leaving you a bunch of distance

for me to think twice,

thrice even a thousand times if needed.

There will be no more mending

since impossible is the only right term left

to describe everything.

Too much ashamed

I felt to confront the real matter

of the situation.

A mere illusion to desire

and accept that my happiness

labeled as 'you.'

What if it wasn't an illusion at all?

I tried to recall how we've met

and reminiscing those short moments

that we had, and I thank God

you've made me smile..

The distance that we had

made me realized that you brought me

to a bigger reality that life become better

for having someone as good as you.

Life begun to find meanings

the day you gave me your smiles...